"Help! I'm stuck in the bathroom, and I can't get out." These are the words Graham would have told me the other day if he could only speak in complete sentences. You see, Graham has this fetish with doors and has had one ever since he started crawling around the house. He loves to go into a room and shut the door. But his love ends there. After a few minutes, he starts crying because he also loves people, and the door that he can close but cannot yet open keeps him separated from people.
Well, one day Graham went into the bathroom and closed the door. He started whining, so I went to open the door and let him out. Plus, who knows what he could get into in the bathroom? About two seconds later he did the same thing- walked into the bathroom and shut the door. I heard him whimper, but told him, "you're just going to have to wait a second while I find my shoes." I quickly found my shoes and went to open the door, but there was one big problem. I couldn't open it. At first I thought G was holding onto the knob preventing me from opening the door, but soon I realized he wasn't that strong. I turned the knob and turned the knob but...nothing. Somehow my little boy can go into a room, shut the door, and lock the door, but he cannot unlock the door or open the door. I started to panic, but caught myself, slowed down, and made a call to Jeff. Jeff told me to go get a coat hanger and try to unlock the door. Now why didn't I think of that? I got a coat hanger and put it through the tiny hole in the door knob, but still nothing. So then I knew the only other option I had was to take the door knob off of the door. I got the screw driver out and finally got the knob off the door. But the door still wouldn't open because I couldn't get the knob off on the other side of the door. I told Jeff the bad news, and he said he would head home to try and help me. In the meantime, Graham was starting to cry a little more. I went into the playroom and found a coloring book. I ripped a page of Charlie Brown's Christmas out of it, grabbed a few crayons, and slid the page through the crack between the door and the floor. Maybe this would occupy his time? (I'm sure you all are well aware that 15 minutes in bathroom jail is like a life sentence in the penitentiary.) But, every time I slid the paper under the door, G would bend down and slide it right back to me. And I thought it was so clever of me to send him coloring pages under the door! Finally, I decided to try and open the door again. I grabbed some pliers, jiggled the other side of the knob like crazy, and at last was able to get the door open.
Whew! What an afternoon. I had hoped Graham had done a little cleaning while he was in bathroom jail, but the floors and bathtub were just as dirty as when he first went in. Maybe before I teach him to unlock and open the door, I'll teach him how to clean the bathroom. You know, just in case it ever happens again.
Cupcakes and Gambling by The Pioneer Woman
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